Friday, December 31, 2004

1 hour and 45 mins more to 2005. Time fly very fast. I was bathing just now, and I thought of posting on my blog and re-called the events that happen this year. OF course I wouldn't be able to re-called what exactly happened EVERYDAY. Only some particular events. Be it in school or at home, or any other. Well, Year 2004, I feel that is the most enjoyable and fun year for me. Many things had happened, and I had learnt alot of precious 'knowledges'. I also feel that, I grow abit. Not in terms of physical, but thinking.

Today is the last day of 2004, and perhaps, last day of me being in Bartley. Well, think about it, I don't bear to leave Bartley. Four years in Bartley. Many happy and sad moments had taken place in there. All the memories seems to be kept in that place. Haiz. All my friends, my teachers and everyone in Bartley. Well, most of the Bartleyans seem to be can't wait to get out of Bartley as soon as possible. Is Bartley really that bad? Are they that not emotional? Don't they have feelings for the place? Well, I don't know. But I don't about others. That's their own opinions and feelings. Nothing can change it.

First day of 2004, which was 1/1/2004. To me, it's just another new year. Well, I think it appeal to everyone. Everyone might think, 'Oh well, it's just another new year' ETC. Yes, it was a new year. But a challenging year to me, because, it's my 'O' level year. Beginning, I was not serious enough about 'O' level. I was as usual, doing my homework, still play computers and watching tv. Well, maybe it's just the beginning. That's why I don't feel the urge of working hard. Actually, at the starting of the year, I told myself, 'This year, is an important year. I must work even harder than before'. But. nah. I just THINK, but never act. Haiz. I'm like that. Only when something push me, then I strive.

When I returned back to school, erm, first day in school in 2004, I'm in 4E2. Well, I feel nothing special about it. I don't feel nervous or what. Just as usual. Just like what I was in Sec 3. Because, all my classmates were the same as Sec 3. No new faces. Nothing. Just that some of our classmates in 3E2 leave and went to other classes. So, I just met my friends in class in morning before assembly. Faces of classmates same. Only different classroom, different teachers(Not all! Some teachers remain the same.). That's all.

As for studies, I'm very happy that I finally had hope in my A.maths because Ms Tay was our A.maths teacher. She made the lessons easier and enable me to understand and learn better. I'm so happy. But the sad thing was, when we took the first A.maths test, many of us failed, because we forgot there's a test. Almost everyone forgot the formulas. This include me too. I failed by a few marks. Ms Tay, of course, was mad. From that day on, our class started to strive on A.maths. Maybe, we started to believe in Ms Tay. Haha.

As usual, in 2004, I still had difficulties in my Chemistry, History and maybe English too. WEll, at the beginning, I always never ask questions if I don't understand. maybe I lazy. Haha. But when 'O' level was a few months away, I started to clarify all those questions that I don't understand. But still, only manage to understand some. Haiz. So, i learnt something, Always ask questions if you don't understand anything. Ya ya. Teachers always say like that. I know from the beginning. But I just don't know why I don't want to ask. Shy? Erm, I don't know. Haha.

This year, is the year, i chased a lot of celebrities. Well, not a lot, I guess. Haha. Why I say that/ Because on this particular day, 15/2/2004, I went to 5566 2nd Album Autograph Session at Bishan Junction 8. Haha, I can remember the date so well, because it was just one day after Valentine Day. So easier for me to remember. Actually, anything to do with 5566, i can remember well. Haha. It's the first time I went for AS, and got my 5566 de CD album, to be autograph by 5566! Haha. But the sad thing was, all my friends were unable to accompany me! So sad. I saw many people came along with their friends, and they could talk about 5566 stuffs, sang their songs etc. I was along. So sad. Only my parents acompany me. Felt so weird. Lolx. But must thanks them, because my dad got red eyes after that due to sit under the sun for long periods. Ya, so next time, they better stay at home. Haha. Ok, back to the subject. I was lonely, but also excited. I remembered I kept looking at my watch. Hoping that it would reach 5pm soon. I kept thinking how I would react. Keep thinking if I could shake hand with Xiezhi. But luckily I wasn't lonely throughout, the group in front of me, talked to me and also the auntie behind me. That auntie talked alot about 5566 stuffs. Haiz. I was listening and also envy at the same time. But then the group of big brother and sisters warned me to be alert, in case that auntie tried to cut 'Q'. Haha.

Ok, finally it's around 5pm. The line started to move forward! Wah! My heart was beating fast. The moment of thinking about seeing xiezhi made me excited! Haha. Finally at 9.15pm, I'm at the open plaza (is it what they call?), where the stage was. I saw 5566 on stage! Wohoo! But I still need to go through a 'maze of barriers' before could get close up to 5566. Haiz, thinking of needed to wait again, I was like, 'huh! must 'Q' again.' Haha. But never mind. Hehe. At every minute, i'm one step nearer to 5566. One by one, I was just RIGHT in front of the stage! Just as I wanted to walk towards the stage, the guard stopped me. Argh. At that time, 5566 was taking a rest. So, all of them stood up. Just as I wanted to take my camera to take picture of xiezhi, the guard said, 'NO camera' I was like 'What the hack! Xiezhi finally stood up and talked to the fans down the stage and you don't allow me to take pictures!!' Argh. But I never said anything, just silent. So sad, no pictures taken on that day. Haiz.

Ok, walking up the stage now. Sheesh! My leg become weak, I'm so scared that I would fall because I'm nervous. AS I walked up, I saw Mengzhe, signing on CD album, Then renfu, then XIEZHI, shaowei and lastly, xiaodao! OH MAN! I was so nervous when I saw xiezhi. He was talking to renfu when I saw 'Happy birthday xiezhi' in chinese. I felt my face boiling. It was so embarrassed because xiezhi never looked up. So i thought he never heard me. However, he looked up after a few seconds I had say. His face looked very blur. Haha. I believed he was thinking, 'did someone call me?'. Haha. But I don't know if he got realised that it was me who called him. haha. Never mind if he didn't. But I hope NEXT YEAR, which is 2005, I can say 'Happy birthday' to him, and he hear it. Haha. Let's hope bla. Happy, but sad and angry. Angry for what? Can see idols. still angry. Ya, I'm angry with the stuffs that there!!! Keep pulling me away, wanted to see the five of them, but end up I only saw mengzhe, renfu and xiezhi. shaowei I didn't saw his face except for the hat he was wearing. As for xiaodao, I think I only saw his hair. You see! So sad. Anyway, I was happy. Hehe.

My autographed 5566 2nd Album

Another seeing idol event was at 8/8/2004. One day before National Day. There was a firework festival concert at MArina Bay. I was there as I had a 'lobang' of selling lightsticks. All thanks to HuiPing, so that I had a chance to watch the concert. Although the selling of the lightsticks failed real badly, but I still manage to watch the concert. Ya, I was HIGH throughout the concert. You guys should have saw me jumping, yelling, screaming and waving the lightsticks. That's was totally not the Shanlyn in school. Haha. So, Karwee, Rasidye, Huiping and Xuemin had saw the 'crazy' side of me. Haha. I still could remember the look that KArwee, huiping and xuemin gave me when I screamed along with the fans, and told Toro to remove his outer coat. I screamed real loud and somemore I drag the tone. Their SURPRISE AND UNBELIEVEABLE look. How I wish I could take photo of their 'rare' expressions. Haha. But also sad again. When 5566 came on stage, I didn't watch their performances till the end. Wah WAh! *sad sad* But forget about it. It had past sometime ago. Haha. Anyway, the pictures of the concert were in 'My Pictures' (in the middle coloumn). Just click the link. I think it's there.

The last 'chasing' idol event, is 4/12/2004, at Singapore Expo Hall 6A. Yay, this month event. And this is a REAL idol chasing event. What's up? S Y L V E S T E R! Haha. Ya, I'm crazy for this Sylvester guy! Like what Huinee say, this guy has 'dian' the girls with his charming smile. Oh no. Can faint. Really! I was like so crazy when I saw him winking to his fans. but not me, so sad. Haha. I was screaming when Sylvester was up on stage. I was just at the second row, so I can see him quite clear. There were many times I almost shake his hands! But didn't!! MY hand were too short! *cry LOUDER* Never mind, manage to take pictures also. Before the event started, I got a paper and used it as my 'temporary' banner. It was totally lousy, but just want to show Sly, that I'M YOUR SUPPORTER! Haha. Just when Sly walked to where I'm standing, I quickly raise up the 'banner' and waved it. I don't know if he saw it. I think he might since it's white and I'm at front too. He did smile and waved back to us. The 'us' is not me. But maybe to the whole group of fans! But I really hoped he waved to me as he saw the banner. HOPE SO! *dream* Haha. After when he performed finish, he walked down the stage, many Sly fans were waiting at the stairs of the stage. I quickly grab my notebook and ran really as fast as I could. I think it's the first time I ran really fast. I didn't think about my health when I ran. I just ran and ran. And I manage to catch up with the big group of fans surrounding Sly. And YES! I managed to stand next to fan, who was just next to Sly! HAHA! I saw his face! But he wore sunglasses. Haha. I quickly used my handphone camera, which was ready to snap Sly pictures at any moment. Haha. Took one. But, BLUR, and was his back! Haiz. Miss again! Never mind, Never mind. There will always be next time. Haha.

And yup! This picture is the 'so-called' that I hold in EXpo that day.
Banner

Oh no! it was 11.30pm! I only have 30 more minutes before 12am!! ok. QUICK! FORWARD FAST.

Now, back to SCHOOL HAPPENINGS.

2004. There's seems to be many test. Not on subjects. But on friendship. This year, there were some problems between my friends. Sebast and xiang Ling. I kept having problems with them. And there were a few times, we were like in a cold war. Sebast was ok. Just once for him. But for Xiang Ling, was a few times.

One morning in Bartley, class 4E2, a fight broke out between Sebastian and me. Over what. Insect. Haha. Well, maybe I was anxious and thought he was going to kill that insect. So I was shouting. I don't feel that I'm shouting at him. Maybe because I'm nervous or what, so my voice was louder that before. But little did I know, SEbastian thought I was shouting at him. As a result, he was angry and started shouting. Being unhappy, I yelled back at him. Fight began. We almost got into fight, if Jian Ren never hold him back.

During this unhappy event, I learnt something. Sebastian seems to wake me up about something. Ya, there's once Pratap was joking about 5566. Being a damn hardcore fan, I shouted at him. But I did it jokingly. Maybe to me, I was just joking and never took it seriously. But maybe to Pratap, he might feel angry. I never realised that until Sebast told me that. Then, I realised that I was really wrong. I stayed in class after that. didn't went for asembly, I thought about it. I shouldn't shout at him like that. I kept crying because of anger and gulit. LAter, I went to apologise to PRatap, in tears. He said it's ok. But i could feel that he wasn't unhappy at that time I shouted at him. Well. after this incident, I began to take note of myself. Maybe because of this, I don't raise my voice unneccesarily, not to SEbastian or anyone anymore. I also began to worry about what others thought of me. Oh ya, this year PArents' meeting day, I actually threw temper to my dad in school, because he forced me to find MR siew as he wanted to talk to me. I refused to as I don't want so much troubles. I'm abit stubborn. So, I threw my temper and I cried. End up, I went back to the classroom where the PArents' meeting were, with Ms prema. (only for our mentor group). I just stormed in the class, with red, wet eyes. Huinee and Polly were shocked to see me crying. Luckily Ms Prema didn't. But I felt that I was making a fool of myself that day. I feel that, this gave a bad impression of me, to everyone. In the classroom, I was like complaining about my dad, in front of Polly's mum somemore. But I didn't care. After when I went home, my parents scold me. I suddenly felt regreted. And I scared now, my friends will have bad impression of me and might dislikes me. That's why I messaged to Huinee and ask her to tell me the truth, how she think of me. Haiz.

After these two, I'm very scared that many of my classmates or friends will dislike me. Or maybe will think that I'm not a good girl. Well, I don't know. But I'm really regret about this. I promised I will never do this again.

Maybe after the fighting incident with Sebast, the friendships between Xiang Ling started to sour. I didn't talk to SEbastian after that. I ignored, but feeling gulity at the same time. I just don't know what to do. But I think it's better to let both of us to cool down for a while. When things were getting fine between me and Sebast, something happen, and Xiang Ling started to treat me differently. I tried not to think too much. But the way she treated me was very different from the last time. So cold. So unfriendly. She don't talk to me and treated me as invisible. At that time, was around May to July, where it was just a few months before my birthday. I was worried. I thought I did something wrong or what. This period, was the time I thought the most. I tried to make eye contact with her, but she just turned away. Of course I was really sad. I cried a few times. I also keep asking Jian Ren and huinee what happened to xiangling, but they kept saying, 'Nothing nothing'. I can sensed that it's not the truth.

Soon, I got fed up. Being ignored and treated coldly everyday, had make me angry with her. I began to ignore her as well. I only talked to Huinee. During that time, I became very sensitive. Whenever someone never talked to me, I would thought that she/he was angry with me. I also began to find Teresa and talked to her, telling her my problems. Teresa kept telling me that xiangling was not angry with me at all or what. But I still couldn't believe. Beside Teresa, i also told my troubles to Xue Min. Haha. They are nice! THey always console me when I'm sad. I'm happy. At least someone is there to listen to my problems and make me feel better. Thanks!

Haiz.

this drag for a few weeks. Sometimes she was cold to me. sometimes she talked to me. I also don't know what to do.

MY birthday came. That day, everyone ignored me. I was like. Really very sad and lonely. I guess Ms Prema saw it. Haha. But afternoon, they gave me surprises! Haha. Thanks!. I was happy of course. Firstly, I thought after all, XiangLing was not angry with me or what.

Just when I thought everything was fine, XiangLing started to ignore me again. Well, I did made Huinee to tell me the truth. She told me everything. Ha, my guess was correct that XiangLIng disliked me. Huinee said, was because of our characteristic. Xiangling disliked me because she find me childish and immatured. I was quite angry at first. I try not to be, but i can't help. In the end, I chose to ignore her. But this time, I started to ignore Huinee too. I don't know why. Maybe I just feel very unhappy and unfair. I begin to treat Huinee abit cold, I admit. But after that, I felt that I should not drag her in as this just between me and xiangling. Well, I'm sorry about that and I apologised to her.

Maybe I'm sensitive again. One day, the class was taking photo for the our page in the Year book. XiangLing and huinee kept taking photos among themselves. I felt lonely and sad. I was thinking why are they like that. I was angry with Huinee for leaving me alone. So, I gave her a fierce look when she entered the class after she came back from the canteen. I think she sensed it. That time, my mood was really bad. And it was Mr Siew's DST. YOu know, Zhenfeng always made alot of noise. As I want silent, I shouted at him. Maybe my tone was really very fierce. Huinee and Teresa knew something was wrong with me. Haha. I saw them making eye contacts, like trying to send signal that 'OH no! what happen to Shanlyn?!'. But I just ignore. Well, I almost cried after that. Don't know why. Maybe I felt terrible in my heart and I just wanted to cry it out.

Haiz, these few months were crying months for me. I kept crying and thinking about what happened and what I done. I cried because I scared that what happened in primary school, might repeated again. But luckily, never.

After the 'storm' was over, everything was fine. XiangLing was okay to me. But sometimes, a bit weird towards me.

After some times, the prelim was over. We got our MAths results. Both E and A Maths. Well, xiangling got higher than me, in terms of overall marks. But for E maths, I score higher than her in Paper 2. And for A maths, did I score higher than her in any paper? erm, can't remember. Never mind. Just this ONE PAPER, XiangLing was unhappy with me. Her black face. I was weird. So I asked Huinee. She told me that because I scored higher than her. I felt weird. Why she get angry over such thing. WEll, I realised later, that since she had been disliked all along, she tended to be unhappy when I scored better than her. At this point, I began to know more about Xiang Ling. From what Huinee said, Xiangling just don't like me to score higher than her, especially MAths. I was unhappy with this. Why is this like that? I scored higher, is because of my effort. I felt unfair. I thought 'Should I score lower than just to please her?' Haiz. I don't know her la.

Until now, everything was ok. We are back to what we used to be. Maybe both of us grow up and learnt something after what had happened. Despite both of us still dislikes some of our characters, we still try to accept each other. Maybe, thhat's a good thing. Try to accept and forget all the unhappy events.


2004, there were others events. CHANGI Broadwalk! Yay! I think this is the most special event I ever had in Year 2004. It was just like a class gathering where everyone went out together, have a breeze and relax ourselves. It was fun! I took many pictures. But then.....ALL THE PICTURES WERE GONE!! Except a few. Because of the stupid computer. The hard disk was spolit and had to reformat. Haiz. I was so sad!! All the photos taken with my friends were gone. Haiz.

There, one photo here. This photo was all 4E2 girls, and our two teachers, Ms Prema and Ms Hayati.

Changi Broadwalk

Those others photos, I had to get it from my friends or maybe try finding it from their friendsters. Haiz.

Time now is 12.27am. It's 2005! Happy New year. Oh man. I think I had lots to say. But my dad! Start to scold liao. Cannot! I must finish this!! 2004!

O level, 1st Nov 2004! OH man! Scary! O Level ok! No kidding. 'O'level, erm, I don't to talk about. Haha.

'O' level End 22nd Nov 2004! Wahahaha.

After that, Prom nite! WAhoo! Cool and fun! But I sacrifice a lot. First time wear strip. And after a few years, I'm wearing dress. And have to wear heels! Haiz. But quite fun. Haha. Can get to see everyone dress differently. Many of them look very suave and pretty. Haha.

Alamak! I think my brain starts to 'break down'. Can't think much. I think I better stop. Maybe continue tommorrow? OK! Sure.

My Class PHoto. 4E2, Bartley 2004!
4E2 (2004)

Ok, the names are paste at the bottom right hand corner of the photo.

The Informal Class photo is very funny! Haha. Look at those faces!
4E2 Informal class photo


HaPPY New Year!